rec.humor@googlegroups.com

Today's topics:

* Chinese food - 9 messages, 3 authors
http://groups.google.com/group/rec.humor/browse_thread/thread/2450e65bb085dfcf?hl=en
* Scottish Dentist - 7 messages, 5 authors
http://groups.google.com/group/rec.humor/browse_thread/thread/2816be6690c592af?hl=en
* surrender - 6 messages, 3 authors
http://groups.google.com/group/rec.humor/browse_thread/thread/c802089baaf3b7ea?hl=en
* Stupid Mistake - 2 messages, 2 authors
http://groups.google.com/group/rec.humor/browse_thread/thread/6d770b0b3fcbb8e8?hl=en
* ATJ.. Born Again Sun, 18 Nov 2007 18:42:20 GMT - 1 messages, 1 author
http://groups.google.com/group/rec.humor/browse_thread/thread/3f2805ea1da0a7e1?hl=en

==============================================================================
TOPIC: Chinese food
http://groups.google.com/group/rec.humor/browse_thread/thread/2450e65bb085dfcf?hl=en
==============================================================================

== 1 of 9 ==
Date: Tues, Nov 20 2007 10:16 am
From: "Greg Evans"

MosNot wrote:

>>>> "Strenuous exercise", for Larry, means having to get up off the
>>>> couch to get another beer from the fridge.
>>> Sure it's not having to lift a filet o fish sammich to his mouth ?
>> Shoot, that requires a major expedition - he has to actually *walk
>> out of his house* to get to his car, then drive it to McDonalds to
>> get the food!
>
> I figured California McDonalds has home delivery.

He's still gotta get up to answer the door. Unless he can get one of
his kids to do it for him, and that carries a high potential risk of
his meal getting commandeered.

== 2 of 9 ==
Date: Tues, Nov 20 2007 1:36 pm
From: Elisabeth Mueller

Greg Evans schrieb:

>Elisabeth Mueller wrote:
>
>>> Elisabeth!! A SRPOTW - to *you*?? What has the world
>>> come to....
>>
>> Finally! I was working on that for about five years.
>
>You must feel so proud.

I do.
Wanna feel it, too?

== 3 of 9 ==
Date: Tues, Nov 20 2007 1:36 pm
From: Elisabeth Mueller

MosNot schrieb:

>
>"Elisabeth Mueller" <maelmill@eunet.at> wrote in message
>news:5tc1k3pieev89m5g1uh8kakqptp553tp5o@4ax.com...
>> ynotssor schrieb:

>>>You misspelled know body ... I have carnival knowledge.
>>
>> You are masked?
>
>He also knows how to spin around until he pukes.

Tell me more about that experience.

== 4 of 9 ==
Date: Tues, Nov 20 2007 1:36 pm
From: Elisabeth Mueller

peachy ashie passion schrieb:

>Elisabeth Mueller wrote:
>
>> Larry Krzewinski schrieb:
>>
>>
>>>On Sat, 10 Nov 2007 17:07:08 +0100, Elisabeth Mueller
>>><maelmill@eunet.at> wrote:
>>
>>
>>>>This is boring. Do something more funny.
>>>
>>>Cool. I always did enjoy telling jokes when I ride bareback.
>>
>>
>> With cool you mean the weather situation when riding bare?
>
> Sounded rather heated to me!

Only in south California.

== 5 of 9 ==
Date: Tues, Nov 20 2007 1:36 pm
From: Elisabeth Mueller

MosNot schrieb:

>
>"Elisabeth Mueller" <maelmill@eunet.at> wrote in message
>news:bhc1k3hh8oo9593sb36g7pkn7vd984jihe@4ax.com...
>> Larry Krzewinski schrieb:
>>
>>>On Sat, 10 Nov 2007 17:07:08 +0100, Elisabeth Mueller
>>><maelmill@eunet.at> wrote:
>>
>>>>This is boring. Do something more funny.
>>>
>>>Cool. I always did enjoy telling jokes when I ride bareback.
>>
>> With cool you mean the weather situation when riding bare?
>
>He meant that him being naked is something to joke about.

I didn't know he was aware of that.

== 6 of 9 ==
Date: Tues, Nov 20 2007 1:36 pm
From: Elisabeth Mueller

Greg Evans schrieb:

>Elisabeth Mueller wrote:
>
>>>> You have twenty-thousand legumes under there, I sea.
>>> Are you calling Elisabeth a washed-up has-bean??
>>
>> So that is what he meant? I am shocked!
>
>Hey, it was ynotssor - I'm just shocked he didn't say something like that
>sooner!

I wouldn't have understood anyway until you translated it.

== 7 of 9 ==
Date: Tues, Nov 20 2007 1:45 pm
From: "Greg Evans"

Elisabeth Mueller wrote:

>>>> You misspelled know body ... I have carnival knowledge.
>>> You are masked?
>> He also knows how to spin around until he pukes.
>
> Tell me more about that experience.

Q: How many bass players does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
A: One - he holds the bulb, and drinks until the room spins.

== 8 of 9 ==
Date: Tues, Nov 20 2007 1:47 pm
From: "Greg Evans"

Elisabeth Mueller wrote:

>> You must feel so proud.
>
> I do.
> Wanna feel it, too?

I guess...but I refuse to close my eyes first!

== 9 of 9 ==
Date: Tues, Nov 20 2007 5:42 pm
From: "SummersFrenzy"

Greg Evans wrote:
> Elisabeth Mueller wrote:
>
>>> You must feel so proud.
>>
>> I do.
>> Wanna feel it, too?
>
> I guess...but I refuse to close my eyes first!

I'm torn . . . admiring your candor and caution . . . or . . . no sense of
adventure, eh?

==============================================================================
TOPIC: Scottish Dentist
http://groups.google.com/group/rec.humor/browse_thread/thread/2816be6690c592af?hl=en
==============================================================================

== 1 of 7 ==
Date: Tues, Nov 20 2007 11:24 am
From: "Bill Colmers"

"SummersFrenzy" <

>> Maybe that explains your affinity for certain chemicals, my dear?
>
> <bats eyelashes> why Doctor . . . whatever do you mean? No, really . . .
> howzat again?

Well, ethanol is a chemical, innit?

>> Prof. Dr. Bill
>>
>> and their affinity for your receptors?
>
> They have affinity? Yay!

Otherwise thye wouldn't work. That would then be a "loss-of-function
mutation".

PDB

== 2 of 7 ==
Date: Tues, Nov 20 2007 11:27 am
From: "Bill Colmers"

"ynotssor"

>> <bats eyelashes>
>
> Do bats have eyebrows too?

Sorta kinda:
http://tinyurl.com/37jo6a

Bill

== 3 of 7 ==
Date: Tues, Nov 20 2007 11:36 am
From: peachy ashie passion

MosNot wrote:

> "peachy ashie passion" <exquisitepeach@hotmail.com> wrote in message
> news:fmn0j.6084$K_3.4952@trnddc03...
>
>>Elisabeth Mueller wrote:
>
>
>>>MosNot schrieb:
>>>
>>>>"Elisabeth Mueller" <maelmill@eunet.at> wrote in message
>>>>
>>>>>peachy ashie passion schrieb:
>>>>>
>>>>>> Ugh. My kid has been eating those. Cheese and mayo on raisin
>>>>>>bread.
>>>>>
>>>>>Kids will eat everything. They will grow up and develop tastebuds,
>>>>>eventually.
>>>>
>>>>Until they do, they'll still want to go to McDonalds.
>>>
>>>It's an easy to read sign of immaturity.
>>
>> I know. I can't HELP being immature!
>
>
> Burger King is better. Flame cooked, not
> sitting on a greasy grill, like at McDonalds.
>
>
Mmm, BK. That's what I had for breakfast today. Yum!

== 4 of 7 ==
Date: Tues, Nov 20 2007 11:33 am
From: "Bill Colmers"

"MosNot"
>
> My favourite burgers:
> http://www.vidaliaonions.com/products/Burgers.htm

Even better when made fresh, grating the onions in - adds incredible
juciness to burgers! Also, the Worcestershire sauce, dijon mustard and a few
secret spices help too.

Bill

== 5 of 7 ==
Date: Tues, Nov 20 2007 12:56 pm
From: "ynotssor"

In news:fhvc9c$m7q$1@tabloid.srv.ualberta.ca,
Bill Colmers <sambomambo@nowhere.com> wrote:

> Well, ethanol is a chemical, innit?

Ethanol is actually one of the fundamental elements necessary for human life
as we know it. Some fairly crude distilled versions of it can be found in
Possum Junction, but that doesn't really qualify as human life there.

== 6 of 7 ==
Date: Tues, Nov 20 2007 1:46 pm
From: "Greg Evans"

ynotssor wrote:

> Ethanol is actually one of the fundamental elements necessary for
> human life as we know it. Some fairly crude distilled versions of it
> can be found in Possum Junction, but that doesn't really qualify as
> human life there.

Are you making fun of our resident Bigfoot?

== 7 of 7 ==
Date: Tues, Nov 20 2007 5:44 pm
From: "SummersFrenzy"

MosNot wrote:
> SummersFrenzy wrote:
>
>> so microwaved, pre-packaged is better . . . okie dokes
>
> What ever floats your boat, Miss Dokes.

I'm not the one eatin' at fast food joints of any nature . . .

==============================================================================
TOPIC: surrender
http://groups.google.com/group/rec.humor/browse_thread/thread/c802089baaf3b7ea?hl=en
==============================================================================

== 1 of 6 ==
Date: Tues, Nov 20 2007 11:34 am
From: peachy ashie passion

Greg Evans wrote:

> peachy ashie passion wrote:
>
>
>>>>Honest John(son)?
>>>
>>><hands Greg a mirror> you tell me
>>
>> I don't even know how a Johnson COULD lie.
>
>
> Johnsons don't lie - they're proud, standup characters!
>
>

That's certainly been my experience with them. That is, until I get
through with them.

== 2 of 6 ==
Date: Tues, Nov 20 2007 12:19 pm
From: "Greg Evans"

peachy ashie passion wrote:

>> Johnsons don't lie - they're proud, standup characters!
>
> That's certainly been my experience with them. That is, until
> I get through with them.

They're probably sad that you're going to leave them alone.

== 3 of 6 ==
Date: Tues, Nov 20 2007 1:36 pm
From: Elisabeth Mueller

MosNot schrieb:

>
>"Elisabeth Mueller" <maelmill@eunet.at> wrote in message
>news:q3c1k3t2kudkrlp4td93tbu52psgag8sak@4ax.com...
>> Larry Krzewinski schrieb:

>>>I volunteer Mos.
>>
>> So this is how volunteering is done in California.
>
>Everything is easier when somebody else does it.

That's easy for you to say.

== 4 of 6 ==
Date: Tues, Nov 20 2007 1:36 pm
From: Elisabeth Mueller

MosNot schrieb:

>
>"Elisabeth Mueller" <maelmill@eunet.at> wrote in message
>news:56c1k311ckjn2mkaa6qrghol389vls8oh1@4ax.com...
>> MosNot schrieb:
>>
>>>
>>>"Elisabeth Mueller" <maelmill@eunet.at> wrote in message
>>>news:rpjbj3dfmb2j2q9ffmft5rf6fkjsacdu05@4ax.com...
>>>> Larry Krzewinski schrieb:

>>>>>Which parallel dimension did you visit this week, dear?
>>>>
>>>> Earth 617.
>>>
>>>Oh, you should have gone to 613 and tried their cheese.
>>
>> <sigh> they already told me so, but I can't find the secret entry
>
>Don't tell anybody:
>Set a course from the old dog star
>A point to the north of Achernar
>fare until, on the starboard beam
>six red suns towards a blue sun stream
>turn left for three blocks and it's on your right.

Starboard, now is that right or left? I always forget.

== 5 of 6 ==
Date: Tues, Nov 20 2007 1:36 pm
From: Elisabeth Mueller

Greg Evans schrieb:

>MosNot wrote:
>
>>>>>> Which parallel dimension did you visit this week, dear?
>>>>> Earth 617.
>>>> Oh, you should have gone to 613 and tried their cheese.
>>> <sigh> they already told me so, but I can't find the secret
>>> entry
>>
>> Don't tell anybody:
>> Set a course from the old dog star
>> A point to the north of Achernar
>> fare until, on the starboard beam
>> six red suns towards a blue sun stream
>> turn left for three blocks and it's on your right.
>
>I thought it was "Second star to the right, and straight on 'til morning"?

You will never, never find the secret entry that way.

== 6 of 6 ==
Date: Tues, Nov 20 2007 1:48 pm
From: "Greg Evans"

Elisabeth Mueller wrote:

>> I thought it was "Second star to the right, and straight on 'til
>> morning"?
>
> You will never, never find the secret entry that way.

You've Hooked me with your description.

==============================================================================
TOPIC: Stupid Mistake
http://groups.google.com/group/rec.humor/browse_thread/thread/6d770b0b3fcbb8e8?hl=en
==============================================================================

== 1 of 2 ==
Date: Tues, Nov 20 2007 11:31 am
From: "Bill Colmers"

"MosNot"

>
> Then would that now make you Very Gladly Disturbed ?

Uh, uh. It makes him "Do Not Disturb"

HTH

Bill

== 2 of 2 ==
Date: Tues, Nov 20 2007 12:18 pm
From: "Greg Evans"

Bill Colmers wrote:

>> Then would that now make you Very Gladly Disturbed ?
>
> Uh, uh. It makes him "Do Not Disturb"

Thank you, Bill. Now - leave me alone.

==============================================================================
TOPIC: ATJ.. Born Again Sun, 18 Nov 2007 18:42:20 GMT
http://groups.google.com/group/rec.humor/browse_thread/thread/3f2805ea1da0a7e1?hl=en
==============================================================================

== 1 of 1 ==
Date: Tues, Nov 20 2007 12:26 pm
From: Richard Catto

peachy ashie passion wrote:
> M wrote:
> > On Sun, 18 Nov 2007 18:42:20 GMT, peachy ashie passion wrote:
> >>M wrote:
> >>>Last post 11/16/07
> >>>Poster: Max Destroyer
> >>>Status of group: finito
> >>>Time to lay waste to every last (non-rh) poster: 6 years 3 months
> >>><turning out lights>
> > On Sun, 18 Nov 2007 18:42:20 GMT, peachy ashie passion wrote;
> >>You must be pleased as punch.
> >>Of course you do know one of them will turn up in a few months and
> >>post again, right?
> > Hey! Yours was the first post of the NEW ATJ!
> Oooh! I OWN the new ATJ. I shall remake it in MY image!

I don't think the world can stand that much ugliness. Better remake it
in MY image! ;)

do you need a makefile for that?

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